A cannibal son and his father are out looking for food. They are watching people walk down the street. The son suggested a particularly plump woman and the father rejected saying that shes too fatty. Later on the son asked about a very skinny woman. Again the father refused saying that shes to skinny. After a while the son pointed out a very attractive woman.” sure son” the father replied, drooling. “Well take her home and eat you mother!”
Cannibals capture three men. The men are told that they will be skinned and eaten and then their skin will be used to make canoes. Then they are each given a final request. The first man asks to be killed as quickly and painlessly as possible. His request is granted, and they poison him. The second man asks for paper and a pen so that he can write a farewell letter to his family. This request is granted, and after he writes his letter, they kill him saving his skin for their canoes. Now it is the third mans turn. He asks for a fork. The cannibals are confused, but it is his final request, so they give him a fork. As soon as he has the fork he begins stabbing himself all over and shouts, “To hell with your canoes!”
The cannibal king was having dinner when a servant came running in. “Your Majesty,” he said, “the slaves are revolting!““You dont have to tell me,” said the king. “Im trying to eat them. “Where did we get these slaves anyway? ““From the country next door,” replied the servant. “We must get a new butcher,” said the king. “Bring me Delia Smith.” “We cant, Your Majesty, shes still cooking for you.” “Well, bring her to me once shes crispy enough,” said the king.