Dan: My little brother is a real pain.
Nan: Things could be worse.Dan: How? Nan: He could be twins !
#Brother and sister jokes
Mum: Why does your little brother jump up and down before taking his medicine?
Boy: Because he read the label, and it said shake well before using.
Whats your fathers occupation? asked the school secretary on the first day of the new academic year.Hes a conjurer, Maam, said the new boy.How interesting. Whats his favourite trick? He saws people in half.Gosh! now, next question. Any brothers or sisters? One half brother and two half sisters.
Why does your sister have yeast and shoe polish for breakfast ?
Because she wants to rise and shine.
Little Brother: Im going to buy a sea horse.Big Brother: Why?
Little Brother: Because I want to play water polo!
My brothers just opened a shop.Really? Hows he doing?
Six months. He opened it with a crowbar.
Big Brother: That planet over there is Mars.
Little Brother: Then that other one must be Pas.
Dad: Dont be selfish. Let your brother use the sled half the time.
Son: I do, Dad. I use it going down the hill and he gets to use it coming up!
Mummy Monster: What are you doing with that saw and wheres your little brother?
Young Monster: Hee, hee ! Hes my half-brother now!
Did the bionic monster have a brother ?
No, but he had lots of trans-sisters!
Mother: Jared, get your little sisters hat out of that puddle.Jared: I cant mum, shes got it strapped too tight under her chin!
My brothers one of the biggest stickup men in town.Gosh is he really?
Yes, hes a six-foot-six billposter.
My sister went on a crash diet.Is that why she looks a wreck ?
Alfie was listening to his sister practice her singing.
Sis, he said, I wish youd sing Christmas carols.Thats nice of you, Alfie, she replied. Why ? Then Id only have to hear you once a year !
Do you like my new baby sister ?
The stalk bought her.Hmm, it looks as if the stalk dropped her on her head.
Michael: Its hard for my sister to eat.
Maureen: Why ? Michael: She cant bear to stop talking.
Teacher: Whats this a picture of ? Class: Dont know, Miss.Teacher: Its a kangaroo.Class: Whats a kangaroo, miss ? Teacher: A kangaroo is a native of Australia.Smallest boy: Wow, my sisters married one of them
A little demon came home from school one day and said to his mother, I hate my sisters guts.All right, said his mother, I wont put them in your sandwiches again.
Doctor, Doctor! my sister thinks shes an elevator.Tell her to come in.
I cant. She doesnt stop at this floor.
Why did your sister jump out the window ?
Because she wanted to try out her new spring suit
My sister is so dim she thinks that a cartoon is a song you sing in a car.