What would you get if you crossed a new-born snake with a basketball? A bouncing baby boa.
Which is the only day you are safe in a cannibal village? Sitterdays (when they eat the baby-sitter instead).
What do you get if you cross a baby with soldiers ? Infantry !
What does a baby computer call his father? Data.
How did the witch almost lose her baby? She didnt take it far enough into the woods.
Why did the vampire baby stop having baby food? He wanted something to get his teeth into.
Cry Baby - by Liza Weeping
Fred: My mums having a new baby. Drew: Whats wrong with the old one?
Knock KnockWhos there !Baby !Baby who ? Baby love, my baby love…. !
My new baby is the image of his father. Never mind. just so long as hes healthy.
What is a baby bee? A little humbug.
Knock knock. Whos there? Underwear. Underwear who? Underwear my baby is tonight?
What are baby witches called? Halloweenies.
What did the mummy snake say to the crying baby snake? Stop crying and viper your nose.
What is a baby: A soft pink thing that makes a lot of noise at one end and has no sense of responsibility at the other.
It cant go on! It cant go on! What cant go on? This babys vest ? its too small for me.
Why did you drop the baby? Well, Mrs Smith said he was a bonny bouncing baby, so I wanted to see if he did.
Knock knock. Whos there? Baby Owl. Baby Owl who? Baby Owl see you later, baby not.
What do baby pythons play with? Rattle-snakes.
How can you tell if a snake is a baby snake? It has a rattle.
What was the policemans babys first words ? Hallo, Hallo, Hallo !
Did you hear about Mrs Dimwits new baby? She thought babies should be pink, so she took this one to the doctor because it was a horrible yeller.
Mum, are the Smiths very poor people? I dont think so, Jimmy. Why do you ask? Because they made such a fuss when their baby swallowed a coin
What do you get if you cross a mountain and a baby ? A cry for Alp !
Doctor, doctor, my babys swallowed a watch! Give it some Epsom Salts: that should help it pass the time.
Daddy, daddy, can I have another glass of water, please? But thats the tenth one Ive given you tonight! Yes, but the babys bedroom is still on fire.
Did you hear about the witch who had the ugliest baby in the world? She didnt push the pram - she pulled it.
©2020 Me Jokes.