Money jokes( Page: 1 of 9 )
VERY IMPORTANT FACTS FROM YOUR FINANCIAL ADVISOR!
Dan was a single guy living at home with his father and working in the family business. When he found out he was going to inherit a fortune when his sickly father died, he decided he needed a wife with which to share his fortune. One evening at an investment seminar, he spotted the most beautiful woman he had ever seen.
Her natural beauty took his breath away. "I may look like just an ordinary man," he said to her, but in just a few years, my father will die and I'll inherit $200 million."
Impressed, the woman obtained his business card....and three days later, she became his stepmother.
Women are so much better at financial planning than men.
Why is money called dough? Because we all knead it.
Where do bees keep their money? In a honey box.
Why did the mean teacher walk around with her purse open? Shed read there was going to be some change in the weather.
Fred collected lots of money from trick-or-treating and he went to the candy store to buy some chocolate. "You should give that money to charity," said the sales girl.Fred thought for a moment and said, "No, Ill buy the chocolate. You give the money to charity."
What happened when the cat swallowed a coin? There was money in the kitty.
How can a can you double your money? By folding it in half.
Three animals were having a drink in a cafe, when the owner asked for the money. "Im not paying," said the duck. "Ive only got one bill and Im not breaking it.""Ive spent my last buck," said the deer. "Then the duckll have to pay," said the skunk. "Getting here cost me my last scent."
Dad, would you like to save some money? I certainly would, son. Any suggestions? Sure. Why not buy me a bike, then I wont wear my shoes out so fast.
I hate paying my income tax.You should be a good citizen - why dont you pay with a smile? Id like to but they insist on money